“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” — Matthew 5:9, ESV
For a long time (like a quarter-of-a-century kind of “long time”), I was probably what you would call a “peacekeeper.” I hated conflict, and even being around it made me deeply uncomfortable, anxious, and desperate to do whatever it took to maintain “peace.” (Some of you might be thinking about how ironic it is that I ended up in law school)
I practically exhausted myself trying to make sure every situation was perfect, everyone was taken care of, and everyone was happy so that the peace would never be disturbed. My mind was occupied with the future—how I could anticipate every need, mood, and situation so that nothing ever went askew. It didn’t matter what the situation was or what it cost me. I was determined to keep the peace, even at the expense of my own.
How many of you can relate?
Friends, Jesus, in his famous “Sermon on the Mount,” highlights the importance of being a peacemaker, not a peacekeeper.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God” (Matthew 5:9, ESV, emphasis added).
Now, I’m still learning what it actually means to be a peacemaker. I’m learning to cultivate genuine peace in my home and relationships, and to let his peace rule within me. That doesn’t mean avoiding every difficult conversation, keeping everyone happy, or becoming some invisible little peacekeeping Cinderella who bends over backward to make sure nobody has a reason to get upset (which doesn’t work anyway).
Making peace requires intentional action, sometimes uncomfortable action, rooted in the peace and love of Christ. This calling is not merely to protect the peace—it is to pursue it. I’m learning that I can be loving without being “agreeable,” honest without being harsh, and willing to address hard things without feeling responsible for everyone’s reaction (I said I’m learning; I’m not an expert).
“Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord” (Hebrews 12:14, NIV).
The Bible doesn’t call us to pursue comfort at all costs. We can maintain the appearance of harmony while resentment, dishonesty, and unhealthy relationships grow. Trying to preserve a mirage of peace often costs us our inner peace. Biblical peace doesn’t require us to continually sweep difficult things under the rug. We are called to make every effort and, in wisdom, to leave the rest to God.
“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness” (James 3:17-18, NIV).
James here connects peace with righteousness. It flows from godly wisdom. We can see it is an active pursuit—we sow peace! Jesus certainly didn’t spend his ministry just making sure people were comfortable. He confronted hypocrisy, corrected people, addressed sin bluntly, and spoke truth in love. Yet he also demonstrated perfect patience, compassion, gentleness, and forgiveness. Yet, wouldn’t you still say he sowed peace? Of course!! He was the ultimate peacemaker! But making peace can sometimes mean disturbing the false appearance of “peace” we have tried to keep.
We are called to model his example and speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). That requires both honesty and humility. It means being willing to have difficult conversations, acknowledge our part in conflict, listen to perspectives we may not agree with, and pursue reconciliation rather than trying to prove we’re right.
For those of us who have spent years avoiding conflict, we may need to learn that someone else’s discomfort doesn’t automatically mean we’ve failed to make peace.
This concept makes me think of the “Peacekeepers” in The Hunger Games movies. Remember them? The ones dressed in the weird white armor suits who supposedly maintained “peace” in the districts by intimidating, punishing, and sometimes literally beating anyone who stepped out of line? Their version of peace was essentially forcing everyone into submission so the Capitol could maintain control. While our personal attempts at keeping the peace probably don’t involve riot gear and public floggings (I mean, I certainly hope not…), the illustration makes a good point: just because everyone is quiet and nobody is causing trouble doesn’t mean there is actually peace.
The Bible also teaches us to exercise discernment:
“A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense” (Proverbs 19:11, NIV).
So obviously, we don’t need to confront every irritation or disagreement. Don’t turn your home, friend group, or workplace into a personal boxing ring (a.k.a. don’t go overboard here). Part of wisdom is knowing what to let go and overlook. But we should address plenty of things in love (Matthew 18:15), and we shouldn’t mistake fear or reluctance to have those conversations for godly patience. We need the discernment to know which is appropriate and the humility and courage to follow through.
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18, NIV).
“As far as it depends on you.” That means we have a responsibility to pursue peace, but we are not responsible for every outcome. We can do everything to approach a situation with humility, honesty, and love. We can apologize, forgive, set appropriate boundaries, and initiate reconciliation. But we cannot control how another person responds.
Frankly, trying to do so is exhausting. (Trust me, I gave it a pretty good go…)
God himself is the ultimate reconciler. 2 Corinthians 5:18 reminds us that “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation” (ESV). Our calling to make peace comes from the very character of the God we serve. He didn’t ignore the brokenness sin caused or pretend it didn’t matter. Through Jesus, he made a way for us to be reconciled to him.
Maybe you need to examine what you’ve been calling “keeping the peace.” Have you been genuinely pursuing healing, truth, and reconciliation, or have you just become skilled at avoiding uncomfortable situations? Are you extending grace and forgiveness, or allowing quiet resentment to grow because you’re unwilling to address what needs to change?
Being a peacemaker doesn’t mean everyone will always be happy with us. It means faithfully pursuing what is right, truthful, and loving, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Genuine peace cannot be built on our ability to manage everyone’s emotions or prevent every disagreement. We are called to be peacemakers. Let’s ask him to show us how to pursue peace faithfully today.
bytaylormcgee.
